Congressional Hits and Misses, Impeachment Edition

People have gotta know whether or not
their presidents a crook Well I’m not a crook I did not have sexual relations
with that woman The conversation that I had absolutely perfect If it were me I would
recommend that they start an investigation into the Bidens. Donald Trump has defeated HIllary Clinton Donald Trump will be the 45th president of the United States. I rise today Mr. Speaker to call for the impeachment of the president I was going to fire Comey. of the United States of America I said you know this Russia thing with Trump
and Russia is a made-up story If you’re trying to make an investigation
go away is firing an FBI director a good way to make that happen? It doesn’t make a lot of sense to me but I’m obviously hopelessly biased given
that I was the one fired. This is the end of my presidency I’m and then he used
the F word The entire thing has been a witch-hunt. I did not consider director
Muller to be on a witch-hunt. President Putin he just said it’s not Russia I don’t see
any reason why it would be Nancy Pelosi I extend to you this gavel. Russia [stammering] Collusion! These could be impeachable offenses but I intend not if we were
with a fact with Impeachment Annnnddd — There was in fact no collusion. Attorney General Barr’s here. He’s here. Attorney General Barr, he came. I hope they now go and take a look at the oranges. The oranges of the investigations. I’m an extremely stable genius. So we’ll go
through these fairly quickly I’ll I’ll talk slowly I’m said that I talk fast The report states that your investigative team included 19 lawyers
and approximately 40 FBI agents and analysts in four counties so those
numbers accurate? Could you repeat that please? I’m not gonna get into
I’m not gonna uh answer that Pretty interesting day Thank you, yes. Yes, thank you. An historic one as
a matter of fact. Can’t get into that can’t get into that I can’t get into it The special counsel’s finding is clear: case closed. Did you ask the Ukraine to investigate
Joe Biden? No. You did ask Ukraine to look into Joe Biden. Of course I did! We must move to impeach this president An official impeachment inquiry. I welcome anyone on
board. The president’s been very clear the President does not want foreign
governments to interfere in our elections We have information on your
opponent oh let me call the FBI give me a break. He’s been very strong about. This is something that is very solemn, it’s something prayerful. Welcome to Fantasy Island, cuz we’re here! I doubt anybody in this place comes to
Congress to impeach the President of the United States And if we don’t impeach
this president he will get reelected I have an Article 2 where I have the
right to do whatever I want as president No quid pro quo You just described is a
quid pro quo We do that all the time with foreign policy No quid pro quo
whatsoever. And I have news for everybody get over it Hold on we have Mark Meadows
right here congressman meadows can we talk live? So he he’s walking by right
now. Republicans are really struggling to defend the president okay great Okay so
Congress Republicans are not struggling on anything. What I can tell you about
the Trump policy toward the Ukraine it was incoherent There is no linkage there is no quid pro quo They seem to be incapable of forming a
quid pro quo I’m gathered here with dozens of my
congressional colleagues because if behind those doors they intend to
overturn the results of an American presidential election we want to know
what’s going on so what happened Yesterday was a high school prank by a
bunch of 50 year old white men Welcome to Impeachappaloosa 2019! It’s not as outlandish as it could be … ? Speaker Nancy Pelosi is trying to
impeach him. It’s not as outlandish as it could be yeah I agree. It must suck to be that dumb. Mr. Speaker I have a point of order Gentleman is not recognized. I have a point of order. Gentleman is not recognized. I have a point of order though. Gentleman is not recognized Ready? President Zelensky quote loves your ass unquote. You have
the cameras rolling? Do you recall saying that? It sounds like something I would
say. Ask the Ukrainians to help him cheat an election I get it you’re mad One of the biggest criticisms of the process has been the speed It’s been going on
for 22 months. The House Committee on the judiciary is introducing two articles of impeachment. This is impeachment lite. Charging the
President of the United States More due process was afforded to those accused in the Salem witch trials. With committing high crimes and misdemeanors. Think I’m afraid? I I don’t know I get afraid? He does this out of love. We’re more
Alice in Wonderland then we are House of Representatives. I solemnly and sadly Oh the chaos oh the sadness! Open the debate on the impeachment Pontius Pilate
afforded more rights to Jesus than the Democrats have afforded this president of the President of the United States They think Hillary Clinton should be the
president and they want to fix that I would remind the gentleman that if as
President Trump is impeached and removed the new president will be Mike Pence not
Hillary Clinton You did it you did it you did it you did it you did it Article one is adopted I would yield to our …. [stammering] It doesn’t really feel like we’re being
impeached The president. Is impeached.

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