Weekend Update on Female Minorities Elected to the Senate – SNL

Weekend Update on Female Minorities Elected to the Senate – SNL


A RECORD NUMBER OF FEMALE
MINORITIES WERE ELECTED TO THE SENATE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] NOW LET’S SEE ALL THEIR NAMES
RIGHT NOW. ♪ THIS IS MY FIGHT ♪
[ LAUGHTER ] WHAT?
THAT WAS IT? THAT WAS THE RECORD?
I THOUGHT I HAD MORE TIME. [ LAUGHTER ]
>>DISNEY HAS RECEIVED PERMISSION TO FLY DRONES OVER
ITS THEME PARKS IN AN EFFORT TO CAPTURE OR KILL ALADDIN.
[ LAUGHTER ]>>I’M MEXICAN.
WHAT WAS I THINKING? A NEW STUDY —
[ LAUGHTER ] A NEW STUDY SHOWS THAT PEOPLE
WITH A VEGETARIAN DIET MAY LIVE LONGER.
OKAY, BUT FOR WHAT? [ LAUGHTER ] AS PRESIDENT, DONALD TRUMP IS
NOW IN CHARGE OF SUPREME COURT APPOINTMENTS WHICH MANY PREDICT
WILL LEAD TO A CONSERVATIVE MAJORITY FOR DECADES TO COME.
MAJORITY FOR DECADES TO COME. HERE TO COMMENT ON THIS IS
LIBERAL JUSTICE RUTH BADER GINSBURG.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>I’M NEVER GOING TO STEP DOWN
NOW, YOU CAN’T GET RID OF ME YA-YA.
>>BUT JUSTICE GINSBURG, I THINK EVERYONE EXPECTS YOU TO RETIRE
SOON, I MEAN YOU’RE 83.>>YEAH, YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT, I
WAS GONNA RETIRE. CLINTON WAS GOING TO WIN AND I
WAS GOING STRAIGHT TO THE DOMINICAN REPUBLIC.
EVEN THOUGH LAST TIME I WAS THERE THEY THOUGHT I WAS A ZIKA
MOSQUITO. [ LAUGHTER ]
BUT NOT NOW. NOT NOW.
NOW I GOT TO STAY ALIVE AND HEALTHY, DAMMIT.
GIVE ME MY THING. EXCUSE ME.
GOT TO TAKE MY VITAMINS.>>YES.
OH MY GOD. [ LAUGHTER ]
YOU GOT THAT?>>YOU GOT WATER?
>>YOU GOT A LITTLE KIND OF ALL OVER — ALL RIGHT.
SO YOU HAVE NO PLANS TO LEAVE THE SUPREME COURT?
>>COLIN, THE BENCH IS NOW MY PORCH.
I’M GOING TO SIT ON IT ALL DAY AND SCREAM, “NO!
GET OUT OF MY YARD!” [ LAUGHTER ]
>>BUT REALISTICALLY, HOW LONG DO YOU THINK YOU CAN HOLD ON?
>>OH, FOREVER, COLIN. I’M EATING A APPLE A DAY TO KEEP
BEN CARSON AWAY. [ LAUGHTER ]
[ APPLAUSE ] BY APPLE I MEAN PURE HUMAN
GROWTH HORMONE. IF THAT DOESN’T WORK, I’VE
HIDDEN HORCRUXES IN ALL THE TAVERNS IN THE D.C. METRO AREA.
>>PEOPLE ARE ALSO WORRIED ABOUT —
[ LAUGHTER ] PEOPLE TRUMP IS CHOOSING FOR HIS
CABINET, NEWT GINGRICH, STEVE BANNON, RUDY GIULIANI —
>>TOO MUCH, COLIN. IS THAT GHOUL GIULIANI REALLY
GOING TO BE OUR ATTORNEY GENERAL?
ALTHOUGH IF I WANT TO LIVE FOREVER MAYBE I SHOULD JUST LET
HIM BITE ME. SPEAKING OF BITING ME, GIULIANI?
HE JUST GOT GINSBURNED. ♪♪♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>CRAZY ON EMERGEN-C RIGHT NOW.
WHAT DO YOU THINK TRUMP DOES NEXT?
>>WHATEVER HE WANTS, THANKS TO HALF THE COUNTRY THAT DIDN’T
EVEN VOTE. YOU KNOW, I REGRETTED MY
COMMENTS ABOUT COLIN KAEPERNICK. BUT THEN THIS WEEK HE SAID HE
DIDN’T VOTE. SO I GUESS THIS GUY TAKES A KNEE
ON EVERYTHING. THAT’S ANOTHER GINSBURN.
[ LAUGHTER ] ♪♪♪
>>OH MY GOSH. YOU KNOW, THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE
LIKE MICHAEL MOORE WHO THINK THAT TRUMP MIGHT GET IMPEACHED
BEFORE HIS FOUR YEARS ARE EVEN OVER.
>>OH, GREAT, THEN WE’LL GET PENCE, THE GAY PEOPLE CAN’T GET
A PIZZA GUY. AWESOME.
EVEN THOUGH, I’M SORRY, TO ME HE LOOKS LIKE THE NEIGHBOR WHO
KISSES KEVIN SPACEY IN “AMERICAN BEAUTY.”
[ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
MIKE PENCE, I’M SORRY YOU LOOKED AT MAGNUM P.I. ONCE AND GOT A
QUARTER CHUB AND YOU’VE BEEN HAUNTED BY IT EVER SINCE.
[ LAUGHTER ] AND THAT’S A GAY GINSBURG.
♪♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
IT MIGHT NOT BE JUST EMERGEN-C.>>IS THERE ANYTHING THAT CAN BE
DONE, DO YOU THINK?>>YEAH, OBAMA CAN CONFIRM MERIC
GAR LAND TOMORROW. AND FINALLY I CAN LEAVE D.C.
THIS BEACH HOUSE IN ARUBA I’VE HAD MY EYE ON.
OH, I JUST NEED THE CRAB INSIDE TO DIE AND I’M IN, BABY.
AND THAT’S NOT A GINSBURN, THAT’S A SUNBURN.
♪♪♪>>WOW.
RUTH BADER GINSBURG, EVERYONE! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
I’M MICHAEL CHE!>>I’M COLIN JOST, GOOD NIGHT!
[ CHEERS AND

100 comments

  1. Damn, 4 out of 100 is a record? We really need to start being more egalitarian. It's good that we have them though, hopefully they can inspire more female leaders. I think the balance of power gets too one sided when one group is over represented, be it conservatives vs liberals or men vs women. Diversity bring diversity of thought, and that's fucking American

  2. does anyone notice how kate says that the emerge-C 'might not just be emerge-c' and then after the sketch, whispers to Jost and he rubs it on his gums. WHAT IS IT?? lol

  3. A great actor, the funniest person I know AND she references horcruxes from Harry Potter? Kate Mckinnon is officially my favourite person in the world.

  4. Yes cant have the dynamic in the Supreme Court before Scalia died I know 4 conservative 1 center and 4 liberal but ur conservative dynamic for decades yea ok

  5. Did anyone think at the end she whispered this is actually cocaine in this bag and that’s why Colin started wiping it up and licking it off his hand lmao

  6. I really like Michael and Colin so I wish they could do actual weekend update for the full 10 minutes instead of having one or two stupid characters that are just there to eat up time. These character bits are way too long

  7. Best part abt watching snl on youtube is reading all of the comments people leave abt how hot colin jost is….big mood

  8. I just realized something, the fact that we’re all ok with having liberal judges and conservative judges, how it’s become part of the common conversation, is the exact opposite of what we expect judges to be and do. Like we’re ok with a Supreme Court judge who has identified themselves into a political category and that’s not going to help destroy the whole country? Oh, wait, too late….

  9. I think it's hysterical how Trump claims to be pro-life. I wouldn't be surprised if somewhere out there is a woman he accidentally got pregnant and paid for her abortion

  10. Horcruxis? I know I’m digging into this too much as a nerd but going by Harry Potter lore have they just insinuated that Ruth Bader Ginsburg has killed several people?

  11. Never forget: Todd in the Shadows called the Hillary disaster way before it happened!
    "This is my fight song…and it is not good…If this is your fight song, you're going to lose!"

  12. That damn Aladdin joke…I love that movie, I’m not seeing the live action movie, and I’m going to hell for laughing at that.

  13. I really wonder what she whispered to Colin that made him try the giant bag of EmergenC. I also wonder why that made people in the comments ask where to pickup a bag like that. Don't they know that that product is a scam? It's been scientifically proven not to work.

  14. Okay, Kate achieves goddess status if she can do Beyoncé. And autocorrect literally spelled Beyoncé for me. I’m done LoL.

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